This past month has been an incredible adventure. I've been on the road, traveling with my wife for her job, and have explored so much of the United States! Much of our sightseeing has included trying each region's cuisine, and while it makes me incredibly happy to eat delicious food, it has not been great for my weight loss.
When I left the hospital, I had lost nearly 15 pounds after only three days. Since then, I have lost 3 pounds--three pounds in six weeks! I kept justifying this stall in progress on the stress of not having any routine/permanent residence at the moment (valid), the fact that many people plateau when they begin eating soft foods (true), and that I was doing the best I could without the ability to prepare my own foods (questionable). The truth is, I am not doing the best I can right now, I'm enjoying as much food as my pouch allows! This isn't necessarily a bad thing, but I am only in post-op Week 7, and am already eating normal foods...in smaller amounts, of course, but certainly not the soft-foods-only diet I should be following. See, I thought that since my tummy was so sensitive immediately following surgery, I would automatically reject foods that I shouldn't be eating yet. So far, I have only had a problem once: a bite of soft noodles a few days ago--I know, I know, definitely not bariatric-friendly--sent my pouch over the edge, and around twenty minutes after eating it, I vomited in my scarf as we were cruising down the highway. With this reaction in mind, I erroneously assumed that if I can tolerate what I'm eating, I'm not eating anything I shouldn't be. That is absolutely not true. Our bodies have an incredible ability to adapt, and our stomachs in particular are made up of rugae, tiny folds on the inside lining which stretch and contract with the coming and going of food. Even though my pouch is much smaller, it still has plenty of these stretchy folds, and every time I push my limits, the rugae expand farther to accommodate my meal. At this point post-op, I shouldn't be putting this kind of stress on my pouch, because it completely negates the point of the surgery! Realizing that I'm doing this, and knowing that I won't be settled in my new home for another two months, has been pretty hard on my psyche. I feel like if I had a stable routine, 24/7 access to my kitchen, and significantly less stress, I would be much more successful at following my diet and losing weight. This is just not the hand I was dealt, so I need to buck up and make the best of it. I'm begrudgingly realizing that I actually do have control of what I eat, but that it's going to take a lot more mindfulness and self control to reset my eating habits. I need to start facing this hard truth. Many doctors recommend the reset diet when their patients begin to revert back to weight gain (typically months to years after the surgery). I'm hoping to modify this diet and reduce its duration to a few days, since I've caught my bad habits fairly early on in journey. The most important thing to keep in mind right now is that I am not a failure, that I have simply wandered off course, but can easily right myself. Letting go of the shame from overeating and making bad food choices is extremely hard (because I've grown up with that my whole life!), but is so important to my success. I have to acknowledge my own humanity, and affirm my strength and my goodness within myself in order to remain positive and stay the course. I promise I'll keep working on it.
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AuthorSarah Ouano is a naturopathic doctor and writer. Currently on a #gsleevejourney, she frequently writes about the intersection of naturopathic medicine and metabolic maintenance, throwing in personal anecdotes and tasty, practical recipes along the way. ArchivesCategories |